Points in the Paint

Fantasy Basketball Opinions, Strategy & Tips

Of Caffeine Crashes and Gag Reflexes: My GMTR Readers’ League Team

Posted by Erik on October 22, 2008

Let me start off with my B.S. excuses as to why I drafted so poorly.

  1. Unlike for all the other drafters present, the draft was at 9 A.M., my time.
  2. I woke up late
  3. I was harassed to make it to work on time.
  4. Grabbed a few cans of Mountain Dew and some grub to wake up my brain for the draft, thus risking being late even more. – stress levels were building up at this point.
  5. Drank the said beverages too quickly – 10 mins before the draft began. – Was now wired as hell.
  6. Was looking over my shoulder every few minutes as I actually had some work to do while the draft was ongoing.

After the draft was over I had to proceed with the rest of the day and with it my responsibilities at work. After I pissed away the caffeine from my body, I crashed and felt like crap. I took a look at my team and felt a bit of vomit  gurgle and griggle as if it wanted to come and slap me in the face for drafting a team like I did.

This isn’t false humility at all. I ended up drafting a “Not-so-big-ball” team. No it isn’t “Midball” either – just in case any of you want to get funny.

But WTF, is a “not-so-big-ball” team? Patience, all will be revealed in the end.

I was in 7th Draft Position. I’ve always felt the mid positions had the least control, and I’ve never been too happy drafting in the middle of the mob. And boy, was I ever in the midst of a mob of mean, monster-drafters!

The first 4 picks went pretty much as predictably as you can set your atomic clock by the certainty that Yao Ming won’t play 70 games this season.

“Mr. Defending Champ”, Patrick of GMTR, shocked us all by picking Marion at 5th! Elton Brand got picked 6th, and I was now in a conundrum as to either pick Dirk or KG!

Round 1 (Pick 7) Dirk Nowitzki – An excellent choice for a big to go with almost any type of small ball strat! He hardly misses any games and looks quite hungry this season to go for that elusive championship. Whether he achieves his goal or not is for another story altogether and another blog post. My point is, he’s motivated. So I now had my eye on Chauncey and Danny Granger, but alas, they both went before my 2nd round pick came around. By the way, so did Deron Williams. Yes folks, bad sprain and all. So I was left with reaching for Steve Nash or Rashard Lewis. Baron Davis was on the board but it’s my policy to stay clear of injury risks. I also found it way too early to go for Jose Calderon or even J-Rich!

I don’t know what came over me. As I ended up reaching for;

Round 2 (Pick 18) David West – I decided to go for another PF who shoots at decent percentages and doesn’t turn the ball over too much. I should have gone with Kevin Martin at this point, or even a Steve Nash pick wouldn’t have been so bad. Oh well, it wasn’t such a bad pick. I actually have David on my upside list this year.

“So big-ball it is.”, I told myself. “Ok let’s not force the small guys, but get some bigs with good FT% and hopefully we can get something going here.”

Enter gag reflex moment, stage left;

Round 3 (Pick 31) Yao Ming – I’m an idiot. I’m a moron. I got enchanted by Mr. 50 Games Played’s 80+ FT% and commited an unforgivable mortal sin. Yup, I’m the knucklehead who drafted Yao Ming in the 3rd round. I’m the guy I normally snicker at during live drafts. I’m the dork who now has to find some spiritual link with an omnipotent force in the universe to beg for Yao to play more games than Tom Brady. This should have been Andrew Bynum, Brad Miller or heck even Agent Zero games played ’til ’09.

What the hell was I thinking? Really?

I don’t really know at this point.

I’m going to try and blame being too wired on too much Mountain Dew or something. But we all know that’s just a load of B.S. right there.


How retarded is it to trash your own pick in your own blog?

Never mind.

Let’s move on.


Round 4 (Pick 42) Mike Dunleavy – Great percentages (46 FG%) for a 3-point shooting guard…

Mike, I’m sorry but I’m not in the mood rave about my picking you while I still have some 2-week old egg-foo-yuck, trying to come up my esophagus.

Oh, to hell with this crap!

This is not cathartic at all.

Let’s just finish this.

This, I guess, is blogging in its purest form;

No real editing, just writing as the thoughts come to mind.

I can’t really see my team that clearly right now. I suppose it’s both the caffeine crash and the Yao pick.

I’m sorry readers. Unsubscribe to PitP. I won’t blame you. There’s nothing I can say or do that will ever re-earn your respect with regards to fantasy hoops.

Here’s my team as a whole, round by agonizing round, well after the 2nd at least. The guys in BLUE are the picks I’m pretty happy with at their spots. The guys in RED are the picks I’m not too happy about. The uncolored picks, I’m simply lukewarm about.

  1. Dirk Nowitzki – 7th pick
  2. David West – 18th pick
  3. Yao Ming – 31st pick
  4. Mike Dunleavy – 42nd pick
  5. LaMarcus Aldridge – 55th pick
  6. Jason Terry – 66th pick
  7. Tony Parker – 79th pick
  8. Anthony Parker – 90th pick
  9. J.R. Smith – 103rd pick
  10. Ricky Davis – 114th pick
  11. Luis Scola – 127th pick – If I didn’t draft Yao in the first place, I wouldn’t have had to reach for Scola at this spot!
  12. Andray Blatche – 138th pick
  13. Earl Watson – 151st pick

In a nutshell, I suppose you can say my team is modeled after my first round pick, Dirk. It’s got some bigs who really don’t rebound or block much but shoot at good percentages; it’s relatively light on the TOs and it shoots treys. It doesn’t have any real passing or steals in the mix.

Just before I hit the Publish button, I’d just like to say that I’m not a quitter. I’m going to make up for my drafting blunders, fighting tooth and nail. I’m glad I can still trade and work the wire as the season progresses. It ain’t over ’til its over! And believe me, I’m gonna bring it.

For a more informative and insightful run down of his team, read Jedi’s more level headed analyis of his team.

Brendaaaaan! Buddy! Please do a complete league breakdown at 2RR so I can least watch someone else trash my team. I just can’t stomach to do it myself.

I’m going to take some painkillers (as I don’t have any Valium handy) and go to bed now. Hopefully this will all feel like bad dream tomorrow.


7 Responses to “Of Caffeine Crashes and Gag Reflexes: My GMTR Readers’ League Team”

  1. Brendan K. said

    In theory, I think I ought to be writing my Masters thesis right now. But damn it, there are draft breakdowns to be done! I have to get another team preview up first though… the clock is ticking.

    Hey, saw you on Ball Don’t Lie today. Congrats.

  2. Erik said

    OMFG! I was too draft struck to read my google reader! Wow! Crap! I have to email the link to everyone I know! I suppose that’s today’s counterpart of cutting up a newspaper article with my name on it and mailing it to my folks! Thanks a billion buddy! I’ll stop at one painkiller, and not drink the whole bottle like I was tempted to do.

  3. Doneycat said

    I could have used a Mountain Dew or 4. I’ve got center eligibles who don’t block, PG eligibles who don’t pass, and a bunch of chuckers. Oh, and 5 rookies. I could be leading the league in free agent pickups this season.

    Say hi to Skeets for me.

  4. Arabain said

    The problem with Dirk in Yahoo is that he’s not C eligible. They seem to consider anybody over 6’6″ a C, but no love for Dirk (which is actually right, for God’s sake). This makes the David West pick seem sort of awkward, because you’re basically duplicating Dirk’s strengths while being unable to address the “other” position – PGs. The PG swarm is getting ridiculous at this point – they go as fast as Usain Bolt on a 200m run. Nash would have made more sense, but oh well.

    I recently had a 14 team league draft, and in the horrible, horrible position of drafting 5th, I started off with Dirk too. I got lucky with Caron falling to me at 24th, but then ALL the good PGs were gone before I could pick again at 33rd (Jose went 26th). Then my computer got disconnected and I autopicked Joe Johnson, and everything went downhill from there. The typical panic mode, reaching for JAMAL CRAWFORD at 52nd, blah blah blah. It doesn’t help when I found out that Brad Miller, my starting center, was out for the 5 games because of a 3rd time weed offence (you might want to put this in your blog – WTF Brad Miller?!)

    I thought you didn’t do too bad, Terry and Aldridge were reaches but Ricky Davis at 114 was an absolute steal. The Yao Ming – Luis Scola hedge was genius. It made the Yao pick sort of a not-too-bad gamble.

    Anyways, Erik, your blog’s the best. I’m addicted to reading your blog, and I’ve basically gone through every article in one week. Keep up the awesome work, and we need it. Thanks.

  5. Erik said

    @ Doney: Thanks for the not-so-motivational pep, but I don’t think that I want to be contented with “not being the worst team”. Well it’s the thought that counts, I suppose. 🙂

    @ Arabain: I appreciate your thoughts and thanks for reading PitP!

  6. […] was my first (and I believe only) truly bonehead pick. I mean, it wasn’t like I took Yao Ming in the 3rd round, but Crawford’s preseason hasn’t been all that positive. I’m just hoping that he […]

  7. […] going on a half-insane rant about picking him in the third round in the above mentioned league in a post on my old blog when it was still hosted on worpress. I was calling myself an idiot and a […]

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